Take 5 #005

-1-

I had to go in for some blood work for my routine 3 month visit to the Rheumatologist. Of course I had pushed it to the last possible minute; because I am, after all, a procrastinator. So there I was ready to walk out the door and I couldn’t find my car keys. I looked everywhere and started to go into panic mode.

I ran downstairs looked around my desk, then ran up stair checked the upstairs desk, my nightstand, my dresser, the chest, the kitchen, my purses, my jacket pockets, my gym bag – nothing. I made this cycle approximately 15 times: up the stairs, down the stairs, up the stairs, down the stairs, for about 20 minutes. Then I noticed my keys were in my pants pocket. What makes this so ridiculous? When I tuck my keys into my pocket, I leave half the keys hanging out… so they jingle when I walk…

-2-

Whilst in the garage last week hanging neon green spider webs with a 3lb metal construction staple-gun for our Halloween Shindig, I had to climb the ladder 5000 times – inching it across the floor little by little as I made progress. Unfortunately, I forgot the stapler was on top of the ladder when I went to move it and the stapler came crashing down on my head.

I stood there for a moment in shock with my hands on my head, essentially waiting to pass out. When I realized I wasn’t going to hit the floor, I thought to myself Hmmm – doesn’t really hurt at all; so my plan was to continue onward with my task. That’s when I noticed blood on my hands. Super, I thought, now I get to drive one-handed to urgent care looking like a dork holding a cloth on my head. And then they’ll have to shave my head for stitches …making me TRULY look like a dork…

As luck would have it, I was able to stop the bleeding with pressure. No complaints from me on that one. What I did find absurdly pleasant about this entire incident was it wasn’t nearly as painful as I thought it would be. Migraines are so much worse, I’d much rather be hit in the head. So bring it on, staple-gun.

-3-

Lee was on a call from work; so to kill time, I decided to channel surf and came across Housewives of Atlanta. I’d never seen the show before, but several facebook friends mentioned they make time for it – I wished I had not. That’s one bizarre show – with some women in desperate need of attention. Just proves money doesn’t buy class.

-4-

My doc prescribed me a painkiller this week – thank the sweet Jesus. I asked Lee to take it in to CVS so I could get some chores around the house accomplished. He dropped in off and went to the gym. When he came back home, I read the label --- Atenlolol. That’s weird, I thought. I thought that was a heart medicine.

I looked at the name: Friend, Valrie

Maybe they put it in the system wrong…

Dr. Phiscle

Who’s that?... Wait a minute … I don’t live on Appaloosa Court…

Stupid pharmacist gave Lee someone else’s prescription.

1) I’m glad I read the script – ‘cause I normally don’t. But you can bet your sweet marbles I always will now.

2) Had I not read it, would I be dead as I already take another heart medication?

3) Would Lee have gotten a large settlement?

-5-

To the family:

We’re headed home for Thanksgiving!