Is it really that difficult?

On average, I head to Starbucks once every two weeks. Two things keep me from being there daily; their crazy expensive prices and the caffeine. Even if it is decaf and I drink it at 7 in the morning, the caffeine will keep me up late at night and I’m drained the next day; so I keep it to a minimum.

My regular is a tall, non-fat, decaf, vanilla latte. If you have ever been to Starbucks and heard some people order, you can appreciate the simplicity of this. Yet, somehow, 98% of the time my order is wrong.

On odd occasion, it’s not a skinny. You can tell this because the fat in the milk will leave a coating in your mouth. Usually though, the vanilla syrup is missing. Well – that just makes it a “latte”, which is borderline gross. Oh, they will happily add the syrup for you if you take it back to the counter; but when you’re out of the parking lot and down the road at the stop light by the time you take a sip, returning for syrup is means you may murder someone.

Last Friday I decided to treat my self. I headed to Starbucks and hit the drive thru. I drove up, gave the girl my order, handed her my money, she handed me my latte, and I decided on this day that from now on I would taste my coffee BEFORE I drive off. So I sipped… /sigh … not a skinny. I handed it back to the girl and she apologized stating even though she called it back to me correctly she had not put it in the computer. ??? Hello??? I smiled at the girl, all the while thinking "You, dear, are a bonafied idiot" and waited for another coffee.

Somewhere in between me tasting the coffee the first time and her handing me the coffee the second time, I forgot my new rule. Certainly it had to be right. How can they screw up one persons order twice in a row? So there I was, sitting at the stop light and I took a sip… no vanilla.... o_O ..... second sip … no vanilla. I thought I would spontaneously combust.

I dared not return; I know my self better. Though violence is never the answer, its oft times seems an AWESOME solution. So it just may be that your local headline one day reads “Insane Woman Goes Berserk in Coffee Shop” – maybe after I get out of prison – they'll get my order right.